when paul and i adopted the cutest dog in the entire world (sorry, you lose) last year, we went into major Dog Whisperer mode… and youtube… and google.. and every medium we could get our hands on. we were determined to have a well-trained dog and we knew we could do it ourselves, maybe also because we’re too poor (cheap) to hire a professional when we could do it ourselves.
thus, i put together a list of top doggy training tips for the diligent DIY type of person. it has been on my fridge for a year, and paul thinks i’m ridiculous because no one is ever going to ask me for advice. i wanted to make a video and post it on youtube and he said no. thanks for the support, husband.
however, i have just learned the most important tip of all, and it took me a year to learn this. i MUST share this golden piece of advice with everyone, as you are to NEVER, EVER do this to your dog.
foolishly, we gave ike some trout the other night. he loved it. happy dog, yay. the doom came the next day, when i smelled poop in the apartment. i searched and searched and couldn’t find any. a few minutes later, the same. no poop.
i decide to take a nap on the couch. ike crawls under the blanket with me to rest by my feet. i woke up startled. my dog had just dutch-ovened me.
next came the audible farts. then we go for a drive and his head is out the window as he is on my lap. the gnarliest fart ever came out of my dog right by my face, and he is only 10 lbs. i wanted to die.
i am still dealing with the repercussions of my actions two days later, as i opened the window next to my desk about 15 minutes ago.
#1 dog lesson: NEVER give your pup trout.