Garage Sales are exhausting…

Garage sales are exhausting.

People are natural born hagglers.  It’s crazy how much people bargain do for a better deal and what they will walk away from just because they didn’t get the dollar amount they want.

Today we had a garage sale.  With two other neighbors in our 70’s shag pad apartment buidling, we were up at 5.45 (read: paul was still in bed) unloading the crap we had stored for years like hoarders, knowing that it wasn’t worth anything but hoping someone would disagree. The night before Paul bet that we would make $35 and I bet on $75 secretly hoping for $200.




But when you’re in that situation there are two positions you can take:

1. the “just take it and give me a buck so it’s out of my life forever”, position


2.  the “maybe i can get two bucks for it”, position

Now your motivation on which stand you take all depends on the piece and how much you feel like killing yourself posting and reposting it on craigslist after no one buys it at your sale.  So we are going to play ‘Guess the Garage Sale Item”.

Scenario A)  A man picks up an item, he says “How much?”.  I say “$20”.  Man scoffs at my ridiculous price, to which I say slowly, “I bought it for $1200” you freakin’ punk.  He strays away from item for a little longer than I feel comfortable with.  Man wins, I fold, he buys item for $16.  What is it?

2005 mac ibook.  The screen didn’t work but the computer did!  I was told it was “vintage” at the genius bar, so I figure I still come out a winner with my 16 smackers.

Scenario B)  Woman picks up an item and tries it on her head region (can’t be too specific and give it away).  She takes it off, looks at it disgusted by what she holds in her hand.  ”How much” she grimaces.  ”$5” I say.  ”Agh, $5?  That is expensiiiiive”.  ”Yes ma’am…” I start but Paul jumps in “Yeah, they’re REAL”, he says.  Woman thinks about it as she pretends to look at more items and buys them from $5.  Take that lady!  You bought it for MY price!  Totally could have stayed strong w/o paul.  What is it?

Giorgio Armani sunglasses.  Okay fine, P got them for free, but that’s not the point, they were real and worth $5 at LEAST!!!

Scenario C)  Woman picks up item and asks P how much it is.  I’m not in site so he guesses $2. “I’ll give you one”, she says.  ”How about you give me 2?” Paul replies, to which lady throws item down and says “Ugh, nevermind.  I have thirteen back at home anyway”.  ”Great!” Paul says.  What is this item?

A crappy belt.  Totally only worth $1, but so not the point.  First of all, it’s weird that she knows exactly how many of the same style belt she has.  Second of all, it was the point that this woman was so cheap that she wouldn’t spend the extra dollar for a belt that clearly she has a passion for.  And lastly, sometimes people are just so cheap that you don’t feel like giving them a deal because you just don’t like their attitude.  Now we’ll go give it to Good Will where they’ll sell it for $5.

Moral of the story, squeeze as much money out of the cheapos as you possibly can, b/c you know you got nothing to lose.  We got $277 and the rest of the goods are going to Good Will, and now I’m sitting on the couch for the rest of the night with a big bag of Costco trail mix.




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